We all persevere to be more kind, giving, capable, reliable, and successful because being better people makes our lives more meaningful and happy. Despite all the efforts we make, though, we encounter difficulties. There are times when our inner critics won’t forgive us for our weaknesses, mistakes, failures, or setbacks, and we get stuck in pain and disappointment. Self-compassion is the power that frees us from these voices. Having the courage to forgive ourselves helps us move on from judging ourselves and allows us to appreciate our strengths and weaknesses for what they truly are: special ingredients for our growth and happiness.
When we’re used to being hard on ourselves in our drive to be the best and do it all, self-compassion may seem like a way to be too easy on ourselves. Our minds get stuck in believing that we deserve the self-criticism. This happens when our self-perception has become used to seeing things as black-or-white. But if you think about it, so much of life can’t be labeled as completely right or completely wrong. Just the way you give others compassion for their mistakes, you deserve self-compassion for your shortcomings, too. Self-compassion is not going to make you lazy. It’s the first crucial step to appreciating who we are, as we are, and seeing our weaknesses as changeable. It frees us from the all-or-nothing mindset and helps us accept responsibility for our mistakes, failures, shortcomings, and setbacks. This forgiveness is the first step to moving forward and allowing your true potential to blossom again.
70% Is Enough – Forgive Yourself For Your Imperfections
It’s important to be mindful that our dreams and goals wouldn’t be dreams and goals if they were achievable right away. Our goals shouldn’t become a reason to blame and shame ourselves whenever we fall short of them. When the inner critic starts talking, we’re usually focusing on the 30% that we couldn’t reach—yet. And it creates the illusion that this represents who we are. But who we are is also made up of the other 70% of good, beauty, achievement, growth, strength, and effort that we achieved. Practicing self-compassion helps us step outside of our frustration and disappointment so we can love the 70% of us that we can be proud of and give ourselves compassion for the 30% that we have yet to reach.
Find the Seeds of Success Within Mistakes – They’re Always There
Our weaknesses, flaws, and mistakes can feel so big, as if they’ve ruined our lives. But it’s all an illusion created by fear. If you look, you’ll find the seeds for growth and happiness within them. A mistake shows us one new thing that doesn’t work. And that means we’re one step closer to our answer. A shortcoming or weakness that we discover means that we moved a step up in our self-knowledge.
Knowledge is power. So by having deeper knowledge of the good ingredients we possess and those we need to reinforce, we’ll know what we need to do next. To err is human. So don’t give in to illusions of fear, frustration, disappointment, and anger. Always believe in yourself and that you’ll always have another chance to bounce back. Never give up on the true potential within you.
Think of Life As Your Workbook
With so many difficulties we face in life, this world is so much like a school and life is so similar to a workbook. There are many obstacles that make us vulnerable to mistakes and setbacks, but they’re teaching us to face and surmount them. With every problem we solve, we grow stronger, learn something new, and grow closer to a higher self.
When we lose confidence and become afraid of the challenges in our workbook, they look like situations that want to expose our flaws. But when we take the courage to embrace our hardships, we’ll appreciate our lives as something very special and unique to us. We’ll see that their true purpose is to develop our wisdom to clear these obstacles. It’s the learning we experience with every relationship, every situation, every opportunity, and every chance encounter that gives us happiness, and not the fact of reaching a destination. Life is a journey; it wasn’t meant to be about never erring, but about how many times we rise above them and keep on going. Practicing self-compassion and believing in the power within us to keep on this beautiful journey is the secret to a meaningful and happy life.