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The Second Key to Meaningful & Happy Relationships: Understanding

Imagine how peaceful and happy our lives would be if we could read each other’s hearts – if everyone had a big window into their souls that allowed us into each other’s inner worlds.

Physical Barriers to Understanding

In reality, though, there are physical barriers to our hearts. And our perception of those around us is taken in through our physical senses, too. Which sometimes tricks us into imagining others as if they were beings of complete perfection or brutal antagonism. We form expectations and perceptions that may not be completely real. And we’re not always able to express ourselves either–we blurt things we didn’t mean to say, we shy away from being too open, or we struggle to find the right words to describe our thoughts and feelings.

Understanding Brings Each Other’s Hearts Together

But if we could know completely what’s going on inside each other’s hearts, we’ll realize that everyone around us is human, as we are. They mirror our inner world; they struggle with the same things we do. Why they did and said certain things that hurt us will start to make sense, since oftentimes, we’ve all been there and done that ourselves. Now, we know that we’re the same, that negative feelings will no longer affect us. And so, our hearts will let go of the anger, frustration, confusion, and hurt, and will give way to acceptance and forgiveness. Understanding is this invisible and real power that brings each other’s hearts together.

Through understanding, the different perspectives, opinions, and values of others will start to make sense to us, too. We may still not agree with them or we may decide that it’s not the choice we want for our lives. But coming to know why they chose their way of thinking helps us forgive differences and appreciate the diverse possibilities that life offers. So much in life is rich and beautiful, not black or white. And we won’t feel rejected when they disagree with us or make different choices, either.

As long as we keep trying, we’ll be able to understand each other even without windows into our souls, because there’s power in selfless love, acceptance, and forgiveness to reach beyond our humanness, into the light and beauty within everyone.

Related: The First Key to Meaningful & Happy Relationships: Forgiveness