DOMESTIC ABUSE, DIVORCE, AND SEPARATION FROM MY CHILD — THEY WERE ALL SEEDS THAT LED ME TO THE TRUTH
I now know the glory of “love that gives”!
Ms. Donna Saunders was given a book on the street that changed her life and healed her emotional wounds from her family problems. Here is her story.
Alone on the couch
About four years ago today, I felt very alone and miserable. Apart from my job as bookkeeper, I had nothing else in life. After I got home from work, I would turn on the TV and sit on the couch till late. Day in and day out, my heart just felt really heavy.
(Oh God, what’s left of my life?)
All the bitter memories kept on repeating over and over in my head—my husband’s depression and attempt at killing himself, my husband’s violence against me and my daughter, and then the divorce... Also of the time my daughter left me on her own volition to live with her father after the divorce, the countless court battles my husband and I had over childcare expenses, and the time my son took drugs and had an overdose.
In seeking for God’s help, I read spiritual books, attended personal development seminars, and tried hard to stay positive. But whenever it was the weekend, I would lose all motivation and just spend my days aimlessly on the couch or bed.
An unexpected encounter
It was when I was walking to the shops to buy some necessities on my way home from work. I saw a number of people who were introducing books to passersby on the streets.
(It’s probably just some advertisement.)
As I walked by, a young lady spoke to me. “Hello! We are Happy Science.” She introduced me to the book, The Laws of the Sun and invited me to the meditation seminar that was held on that day in a library nearby.
(Meditation... That sounds good.)
When I went to the seminar that evening, I was so moved by its deep profound content. I wanted to learn more and became a Happy Science member on the spot.
From that day, I started going to the Happy Science local temple after work and on weekends. Many people always welcomed me with bright smiles and warm hugs.
(I love it here...)
Reflecting on the cause of my conflicts
The more I studied the teachings of Master Ryuho Okawa, the more I began to understand that everything—and I mean all the suffering that I encountered in my life—has a meaning, and learned how I can overcome them by changing them into seeds to nourish my soul. For as long as I can remember, the conflicts or love-hate relationships with my husband and children were making me suffer, but Master Okawa’s teaching of “love that gives” gave me the answers to overcome them.
Love that gives means to truly love other people without seeking for anything in return. It also taught me that this unconditional love is the real love that makes humans happy.
(I just wanted to be loved by my family. But this discontented feeling of mine was making me think that I wasn’t loved enough and was instead making me suffer.)
I realized that this mind of complaining or seeking was the cause of my suffering. So through the seminars that were held at my local temple, I looked back on myself quarrelling with my family, and removed my attachments of feeling unloved, one by one.
Then, my heavy heart began to feel lighter and lighter, and instead, it started to overflow with sincere feelings of wanting to give love to others more and more.
(I will be the giver from now on!)
I decided from then on to make efforts on communicating well with my husband and daughter to improve our relationship.
“Love that gives” changed my family relations
However much I tried, my husband and daughter still treated me harshly and said inconsiderate things, just like how our relationship was in the past. But I reminded myself of Master Okawa’s teaching which teaches that we all came from heaven and are brothers and sisters. When I do, I would naturally be able to forgive them, and rather have gratitude toward them for giving me lessons.
It was little by little, yet slowly but surely, my relationship with my family began to harmonize.
(Whatever situation I am in,I can always practice giving love!My past sufferings were all seeds that led me to this Truth.)
The sadness that I experienced from separating and distancing from my family whom I used to live with got me wondering what it is that connects people together. And I now know that “love that gives” is the very power that connects people together.
(There must be many people who have sufferings of love like me. Now it’s my turn to tell the happiness of giving love to people!)
My soul has grown tenfold!
I currently tell Master Okawa’s teachings to local people living in Toronto with my friends at Toronto local temple. Being able to deliver God’s love to people every day is very fulfilling. I no longer feel loneliness or sufferings like I did in the past. Had I not encountered Happy Science, I would still be on the couch today. My soul has grown tenfold by having faith in Master Okawa. I strongly believe that my mission of life is to learn and convey this teaching.
I hope to spread Happy Science in Toronto, where Master Okawa gave us a lecture in 2019, and make as many people as I can happier. As long as I live, I will do my best.